Yum Yum or Yuck Yuck?

小大人

Joash is such a handsome boy! He is indeed everything I asked God for.

Doesn't he look just like his Daddy?

Pride and Envy

I was reading this blog at baby center about how some mothers feel guilty that they have very easy babies (sleep through the night easily, very smiley, eat well etc...) and their friends who have fussy babies would be sooooo jealous. They even feel compelled to lie so that their rest-deprived friends wouldn't hate them for it. Some mothers, on the other hand, commented that they brag about their easy babies and feel that they have earned it and will give advice to those mothers whose children are not as wonderful.

I personally have experienced both pride and envy. I had such a tough pregnancy that I feel so ridiculously jealous when I see other pregnant women who breeze through the process. I have both friends whose babies sleep through the night earlier than my son and friends whose babies refuse to sleep through the night till they're rather old. I have a very sociable baby and I often hear other mothers rave to me enviously about how blessed I am to have such an easy baby as he doesn't fuss in public. All I can say to such people is, "Yes, I'm blessed and thank God for that." without bothering to share about the fussiness I have to endure behind the scene. They wouldn't hear any of it anyway. I also have tons of unsolicited contradicting advice about raising children from all sorts of people and it irritates me to no end that they tout their methods as if they were gospel truths. I'm doubly angry at the audacity of those mothers who weren't even their children's main caregiver!

The journey of motherhood is indeed fraught with treacherous emotional and behaviorial traps. How should one respond to the entire spectrum of responses about your baby from other people? Is there even a best way to deal with the unfair judgements or the insane jealousy of others?

Since I know that God has created us and our babies differently, I have concluded that there is no such thing as "should" in parenting. Instead, "whatever works" seems more like it. A method that works for one may not work for another. A child that is great at one area may not do well in others. We must not brag about any of our child's accomplishments as we are not our children's maker (though we are to be good stewards of them). We should not feel unduly guilty if despite our best efforts, the kids just doesn't perform. We must extend sympathy to those mothers who have it tough and be happy for those who have it easy. Only God is the perfect parent.

That said, much to my chagrin, I have given my share of unwanted advice and exclamations of covetousness. It is just so tempting to boast about the good things in my child, take credit for them and lord it over those less fortunate. It is equally difficult to maintain a calm demeanor when others question or criticize my parenting skills unfairly. I can only depend on God to guide me along the way. May God help me to stay true to my belief and react appropriately to other parents!

Crazy Couples

Here's finally a nice decent photo of us. *smiles*

... And some pretty spastic ones *evil laughter*

I'm really really gonna miss them!!! *bawls*

Flipping

NOTHING can stop Joash from flipping over now! *thunder and lightning*

Two nights ago, he started to turn over EVEN in his sleep but since he was stuck on his tummy and had forgotten how to turn over onto his back, he woke up and cried for help. This meant waking up four times in the night to rescue him!

Last night, I thought of the brilliant idea of putting him against the corner of the cot to prevent him from turning over as I noticed he tends to turn towards his left. It worked only for a while. Just now, he woke us up at 4am (after 8 hrs of sleep) and we found him on his tummy again! Hahaha.... I wish I had CCTV so I can see how he managed to squirm into that position while sleeping.

And didn't I previously ask for patience from God if Joash has night-wakings again? *grin*

I'm totally off form!

Yesterday morning, my church had an outreach event at Bukit Timah Hill. This was my first "physical exertion" since I gave birth. Due to a tough pregnancy, I hadn't been keeping to my exercise routine for nearly a year. And you know what? I was so out of shape! Granted, I have never been good at anti-gravitational activities which explains why I hate climbing stairs, dislike running uphill and have never gone for a hike in my life. I'll rather walk a longer route to cross the traffic lights than taking the overhead bridge any day!

Anyways, I was panting terribly and got dizzy at certain points while climbing the seemingly never-ending stairs up and down the hill. I had to rest many times which meant that Joshua and I had to let the rest of our group go ahead of us. This was absolute "malu-ation" as the older members of the group were doing so much better than I did! Thank God we didn't bring Joash along or else we would have a 7kg load to grapple with! *faint*

This is also the first time I felt so useless during an outreach event cos I could hardly talk to any of the newcomers! I just knew that there is a very good reason why God placed me in the Performing Arts Ministry instead of the Sports and Adventure Ministry when I was in SYFC...

Looks like I'll stick to running AROUND hills instead of climbing them. I am so swearing off hiking from now on!

Sleeping through the Night

Finally... What I have been praying for daily since Joash's birth has come to pass. *drum roll* Joash is capable of sleeping through the night!!! Hallelujah!

Last night, he slept from 8pm to 6am this morning! It was indeed a very slow and gradual process to reach this ideal state. For a while recently, I have stopped waiting for his middle of the night feed before I sleep. (He has been waking up only once at around midnight for the past month) This is because his night feed has been pushed back to around 3am over time and so I figure there is no point in keeping awake for him anymore.

I realize that he sleeps longer on days when he feeds well. As I've mentioned, drinking milk has been quite a struggle cos he refuses to drink till he is full due to his playful nature. When he slept from 9pm till 6am a few days back, I thought that was just a one time miracle especially since we put him in bed late. But then, he slept from 6.30pm till 4.30am just two nights ago. Looks like it has become a pattern for him to sleep for 10 hours straight at night. Praise the Lord!

Though he has learnt this crucial skill only at 4 and a half months old, I believe that I am already blessed. (Of course to those mothers whose babies sleep through the night at 1 or 2 months old this is no big deal) I also know that sometimes as children grow older, they will suddenly change their sleeping patterns and wake up again for no apparent reason even if they have been a good sleeper for a long time. I pray that God will help me to be patient and flexible if and when the time comes. *grin*

We belong together!

My bestie is back!!! Yeah!

The moment I had been looking forward to since last year has finally come and gone. Over the weekend, my BFF and her hubby stayed with us and it's hilarious how much fun we had. It was simply heavenly! Even though we didn't know the husband at all before that, we hit it off so well with one another that we could have been friends for years. The time the four of us spent together was so blissfully enjoyable that sleeping seemed like a waste of time! Hahahaha.... which explains why I am super zonked out right now... heh heh...

Sigh... It would really be so perfect if we can continue to live under the same roof. A pity they have to eventually settle down in Australia. For one moment, migrating there too looks like such a great idea to me. Oh well... anyways... We are literally friends forever since we are brothers and sisters in Christ because we can spend an eternity in heaven even after we pass on!

Oops! I can't believe it... We were so busy savouring our time hanging out together that we forgot to take pictures! Aarrrggghhhh!

Just some random thoughts...

It was amazing how Joash could sleep soundly at night even though we adults were talking animatedly and roaring with laughter every now and then during the wee hours of the morning. Talk about like father, like son. *wink wink* I hope our ridiculous noise level for the past two nights has not resulted in us sensing a murderous intent... from our neighbours. Heh heh...

Joash is trying to be a gymnast? He has flipped over on his own for the first time yesterday! *a round of applause* And there's more... Now that he has found his feet, he has proceeded to eating them... Ahhhh gross!

One last thing... During my afternoon nap today, I dreamt that I gave birth to a baby girl! かわいい!!! ("So cute" in Jap) Hmmm.... Was that a prophecy or a subconscious expression of my overwhelming desire? Only God knows... :P

What's new?

A week ago, I had been busy transforming the study room into Joash's room. I want a baby-safe place in the house where Joash can roam about without any worry when he eventually learns how to crawl. We bought the MAMMUT children series from IKEA to keep and put all his things. (Our store room has no more space for his stuff!!!) With all the hand-me-down clothes and clothes given by our friends and family, his new wardrobe is actually full already! Joash is truly blessed and well-loved... *grin*

A month ago, Joash managed to learn how to put his hands together, as if wishing someone "Gong Xi Gong Xi", and hold onto a red packet just in time for CNY... hahaha... I was praying for that to happen... to the delight of the relatives. heh heh... Recently, he has learnt yet newer skills. Check it out!

Sitting very well with support...

... and Joash discovered his feet! Yeah!

Taking delight

"This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his
one and only Son into the world that we might live through him."
1 John 4:9
"Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name,
he gave the right to become children of God"
John 1:12

"The LORD disciplines those he loves,
as a father the son he delights in."
Proverbs 3:12
"The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand."
Psalm 121:5

For many years as a Christian, I've heard and read countless times how God sent his only Son to die so that we can become His children. It was only during last Sunday's church service that I've understood this truth at a deeper level. As we partook the Lord's supper, I somehow was led by the Holy Spirit to imagine if it were Joash being sent to die for the whole of mankind. What if he was the one being hung on the cross for a crime he did not commit? I actually felt like crying. It dawned upon me the extent of God's love for us at an emotional level.

I also find myself madly in love with Joash even when he is fussy and at times inconsolable. As I trained him to sleep on his own, enduring his crying, wasn't that done out of love for him too? My heart overflows with delight even as I watch Joash sleep. I then ask myself: Is that how God sees us? God is pleased with us even if we have not done anything at all. Being a parent has opened my eyes to see even more of God's wonderful love for us. Praise God for his everlasting love!

Here's something that really amuses me as I watch Joash sleep. Look closely at his mouth...